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Emptybottle.org

I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate
A poet, a pawn and a king


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Wonderchicken Resurgent »

Bitch, Bitch, Bitch

So I'm having one of those days. Must be the onset of the Hot and Wet season. Man I hate that.

A Few Random Things I Miss About Australia (or Canada, I guess), Because I Chose To Come Back To Korea For More Punishment

  • beer other than fizzy, metallic lager
  • cheese and deli meats of any description
  • driving
  • magazines
  • books made of paper
  • libraries
  • bookstores
  • bars and pubs
  • good bread
  • turkey
  • international food - Thai, Turkish, Mexican, you name it, other than Korean and nasty yankee junkfood badly imitated or franchised
  • having an oven
  • promotions and professional recognition
  • clean air and water
  • TV and movies (that I don't have to download illicitly)
  • off-the-rack clothing and shoes that fit
  • random jocular interactions with people at shops
  • being invisible
  • cocktails
  • friends
  • beaches
  • 'taking the piss' and 'going out on the piss'
  • Nicorette Inhalers
  • drug stores
  • nice apartments
  • community other than virtual
  • Edit: jesus christ on a popsicle stick, I forgot limes. I miss limes like you would not freakin' believe.

AusThings I Don't Miss So Much

  • exorbitant health insurance
  • telemarketers
  • rent and utility bills and ratbastard real estate agencies
  • pauperizing income tax rates
  • metred broadband
  • Australian banks
  • the utter lack of internet shopping

Could be worse. I could be a dog in outer space. [/obscure injoke]

About This Post

What is this? Why am I here? What does it mean? Where should I go now?

Well, this is a post to the personal website Emptybottle.org. It was posted by your genial host stavrosthewonderchicken on June 2, 2005, and is titled Bitch, Bitch, Bitch. It was published to the categories: Korea-related. In any of those places you might well find other similar things that will bring you Super Double Happiness.

Note: Super Double Happiness is not guaranteed. Void where prohibited by local regulation.

If you feel like it, why not join the personal publishing revolution and leave a comment

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The previous entry on the site is Consumer Mindset, and the next one is Wonderchicken Resurgent.

Enjoy your stay, and please indulge sensibly.

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Comments: You got fingers, right?
11 Comments |
  1. 1

    andrew said

    Um, so what are the books made of? And I guess good red wine would be a rarity in Korea, yes?

    June 2, 2005 9:24 PM

  2. 2

    stavrosthewonderchicken said

    All my books are ebooks. I read them on my laptop in bed. I am going blind. Not a wine drinker me, but you can actually get wine, at the Carrefour, which inexplicably (it's a French chain) has become one of the biggest bigbox stores here. There's one about an hour away by bus. We go infrequently. No car. Thus the 'missing driving' bit.

    June 2, 2005 10:12 PM

  3. 3

    matt c said

    Not sure you'd miss the new 'voice-mail spam' showing up on our answering machines, either. Phone doesn't even ring.. damned if I can figure that one out.

    June 3, 2005 10:20 AM

  4. 4

    Babonomad said

    I always missed the smell of a freshly mowed lawn.

    June 4, 2005 5:24 AM

  5. 5

    dv said

    Mmmm. Limes.

    June 10, 2005 12:19 AM

  6. 6

    Shelley said

    You can't get limes there? At all? I hope you get a chance to at a minimum visit Australia or home.

    June 11, 2005 11:01 AM

  7. 7

    stavrosthewonderchicken said

    Weep for me, internets! Weep!

    June 15, 2005 9:33 PM

  8. 8

    tizzie said

    We don't have telemarketers anymore, by the way. "Do not call" list - damn thing actually works.

    June 18, 2005 8:28 AM

  9. 9

    Patry said

    I think I know what taking the piss is, but not quite sure about 'going out on the piss.' Please educate.

    June 24, 2005 1:04 PM

  10. 10

    matt c said

    So a lime and a cool refreshing beer walk into a bar and the bartender looks at the lime and says' "Hey wonderchicken, did you break your typing finger, or what?" Just hard up for good reading, cuz- we're still WELL ahead of the 12 year schedule.

    June 30, 2005 11:23 PM

  11. 11

    Matt said

    The heat and wet have unpacked their bags here in Japan as well, and show no sign of leaving any time soon. Turkey, mexican food, and being invisible are all big ones. But what I always miss most are the whole classes of people who will never come to this part of the world. Regular folks. Working guys and mouthy waitresses. And, uh, mexican food.

    July 2, 2005 10:34 PM

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