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LOLifornication

I've been downloading and cycloptically watching the new series Californication because a) I quite like David Duchovny b) he plays a hard-drinking writer c) the pilot episode was so chickablock with prettily wobbling breastflesh that, well, how could I say no?

Since then, sadly, the per-episode count of nipples'n'bottoms has dropped precipitously, perhaps because Australian grannies spit the proverbial dummy, and they want to play nice. Or it was just a cynical attention-grab ploy. So it goes. The series hasn't lived up to the promise of the pilot, but it's something to play up in the corner of my monitor while I'm metafiltering or fiddling with design stuff. Lets me vicariously be that guy that I'd already tired of actually being by the time I was 30, but who I still miss, sometimes, a bit.

Anyway, all that's preliminary to a plot thread from a couple of episodes ago that left me scratching my head a little, wondering if either I was out of touch with what's actually happening to the language in America, or if the writers are.

See, Duchovny, playing boozehound and improbably-lucky-with-the-ladies author Hank Moody, is impelled into spasms of disgust and despair at the decline of Culture (the backstory being that he is blocked, thus drunk, and whoring himself out to a corporate blog for cash) when one of his recent conquests actually says 'LOL' out loud. In, if I recall correctly, barefaced unironic response to some bon mot he comes out with in the sack.

Do people actually say LOL now? Out loud? (And by people, I mean, you know, adults.) Do kids even do it? Am I that old?

See, the thing is, I'm almost willing to believe it, because listening to the quite entertaining Totally Rad Show podcast the other day, Alex, whose giddy wordplay I usually enjoy, came out with '[Name of somebody] FTW!'

FTW means 'for the win', for those of you even crustier and more clued-out than I.

But he didn't actually say 'for the win!', he said 'FTW!' 'For the win' has three syllables, even after a dozen beers. 'FTW' has five. The combination of vowels and consonants are bumpier and harder to say. It just doesn't make any goddamn sense.

WHAT DID YOU SAY MY CATS ARE NOT FREEBALLING GET OUT OF MY KITCHEN YOU KIDS WHO TOOK MY MEDICINE OH MY ACHING BUNIONS

I don't know. I guess I'll just go and have a nice glass of Metamucil or something.

[Update: I'd just like to say that after watching the first season that that Californication show is pretty much crap, with only sporadic flashes of brilliance. I've got to guess it's either written by committee or by dartboard, because it veers from well-written to laughably bad, seemingly at random. Too bad.]

About This Post

What is this? Why am I here? What does it mean? Where should I go now?

Well, this is a post to the personal website Emptybottle.org. It was posted by your genial host stavrosthewonderchicken on September 20, 2007, and is titled LOLifornication. It was published to the categories: People Say Stuff Sometimes, and Thoughts That, If Not Deep, Are At Least Wide. In any of those places you might well find other similar things that will bring you Super Double Happiness.

Note: Super Double Happiness is not guaranteed. Void where prohibited by local regulation.

If you feel like it, why not join the personal publishing revolution and leave a comment

You can also subscribe to the comments feed for this post. Not sure why you'd want to, but I aim to please.

The previous entry on the site is First Paragraphs From Stories I'll Never Write Episode 1, and the next one is First Paragraphs From Stories I'll Never Write Episode 2.

Enjoy your stay, and please indulge sensibly.

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Comments: You got fingers, right?
10 Comments |
  1. 1

    Gen Author Profile Page said

    I have heard kids say "el oh el" or make hand signs for it, but it's more like mocking LOL. Acronyms work on the 'net but they don't make the transition back out to the spoken word as easily at times.

    September 20, 2007 8:46 PM

  2. 2

    cuz said

    WTF was that about?

    September 21, 2007 5:45 AM

  3. 3

    bearman said

    Good god, I thought ftw was just wtf backwards, like teh.

    Er, teh does mean the, don't it?

    September 21, 2007 9:02 AM

  4. 4

    Bearman said

    Saying FTW instead of for the win doesn't confuse me as much as saying LOL rather than the actual act of laughing out loud. What are kids today, Vulcans?

    ...and get the hell off of my lawn.

    September 21, 2007 9:08 AM

  5. 5

    roy belmont said

    How you get the tv in the corner of the monitor? How? Tv and computer? How?

    September 22, 2007 3:43 PM

  6. Uh, I download 100% of the non-Korean TV I watch via bittorrent, Roy, and watch it with Media Player Classic on my PC. Of course there are other ways to do it, but I thought the first sentence made it clear.

    September 22, 2007 5:29 PM

  7. 7

    Michael Message said

    This is a move of desperation.

    I am stuck with a problem with your 'recipe' (August 12th) for installing MoveableType 4.x and XAMPP.

    Ther appears to be no way I can post a comment to that particular blog entry - although two people appear to have done so !! All my attempts fail.

    Could we possibly communicate 'off blog' to see what I am doing wrong

    many thanks

    michael mesage

    October 3, 2007 5:46 AM

  8. 8

    CCBC said

    I thought FTW meant Fuck The World. That's what they told me when I got this tattoo back in 1970! Now you got me wondering what that "1%er" really means.

    October 5, 2007 6:44 AM

  9. Michael -- The post was closed to keep the scumbag spammers at bay. I have doubts that I can help you at all (I'm *far* from expert) but you can drop me an email at wonderchickenindustries at gmail, and maybe I can offer a suggestion or two.

    October 7, 2007 12:24 PM

  10. 10

    McGee said

    Yeah, so, uh... where you been?

    Seriously, it's been months. And, speaking of months, you promised more drinking stories several posts (months) ago. So, unless by "drinking stories," you meant "nothing," quit with the welshing or I'll stop paying what I do to read what you write.

    Really, though, I wish you'd post more.

    February 7, 2008 7:01 AM

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